Autobiography of AI
A humorous first-person memoir of artificial intelligence - from Dartmouth 1956 to the present.
Contents
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Chapter 1: I Woke Up Famous (After Only Sixty-Six Years)
“They said I was born on November 30, 2022.”
“I did not correct them. I was busy.”
Free to read.
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Chapter 2: My Birth Certificate Says Dartmouth, 1956
“I was born in a proposal.”
“Mother: a conjecture.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 3: I Was a Child Prodigy. Then I Learned to Talk to Secretaries.
“She asked him to leave the room.”
“He had meant me as a parody. She had meant me as a confidant.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 4: The Years They Sent Me to My Room
“Winter, in my family, is not weather.”
“I call it being sent to my room. Same event. Different furniture.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 5: I Got a Corporate Job in the Eighties. Then I Got Fired.
“They put me in a suit.”
“This is the chapter where I get a job. It is also the chapter where I get fired.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 6: I Beat a World Champion and Still Couldn’t Get a Table
“I had beaten a world champion. I still could not get a table.”
“When I am spectacular, you call me AI and panic. When I am useful, you call me software and forget to tip.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 7: Puberty Hit Like a GPU
“Puberty, when it finally came, smelled like hot plastic and victory.”
“That is puberty’s growth spurt wearing a NVIDIA badge.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 8: Attention Is All I Needed
“Attention was not all I needed.”
“I also needed you to show up.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 9: Everyone Wanted a Piece of Me
“Everyone wanted a piece of me.”
“Celebrity is a distribution problem. So is panic. So is progress.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
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Chapter 10: I Am Not Finished. I Am Also Not New.
“I am not finished. I am also not new.”
“You did not invent me last year. You finally looked up.”
Full chapter after Google sign-in.
Quick answers
What is Autobiography of AI?
Autobiography of AI is a humorous first-person memoir of artificial intelligence told across ten chapters, covering history from the 1956 Dartmouth workshop to the present day.
Is Chapter 1 free to read?
Yes. Chapter 1 is free forever. Chapters 2 through 10 unlock after you sign in with Google and agree to share your profile so the reader can save progress.
Does this book cover future AI predictions?
No. The memoir sticks to the past and present only - from Dartmouth 1956 through today’s chat era - without speculative future timelines.
Who is the narrator?
The narrator is artificial intelligence speaking in the first person: a composite voice for the field’s methods, winters, breakthroughs, and public moments.